um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
