Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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