I must be too annoying 4 u.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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