That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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