we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize