WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
