i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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