Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
