you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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