If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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