i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Alive.
So much puke
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize