So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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