Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize
