we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize