Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
