mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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