I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
the liver wants what the liver wants
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
