Midget sex pt 2 tonight
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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