Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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