I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize