I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize