I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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