This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I need moral support for this bender
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
