According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
