Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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