This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
