Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I need water and some morals
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
