Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I am one with the molecules
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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