worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize