if i can run in heels then i can drive
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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