so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
