How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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