ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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