yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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