so explain again why im purple
no
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
