Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My room smells like vodka and shame
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
