i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
