i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize