No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize