Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
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