If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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