Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
