At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
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Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
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Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I need to sanitize my soul.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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