More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
