we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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