I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
