guys are only as good as the porn they watch
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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