Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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