O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize