so that wasnt chicken after all
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
